Best Friends or Lovers?

by adrianna
(los angeles)

Best Friends or Lovers?


This guy and I have been best friends for about 3 years. We've always been really close until we both told each other how we really feel. He wanted to go out, but he wanted to tell people and I wanted to keep it a secret because our families would never let us alone if they knew. (Our families are very close.)

We just decided to stay friends and I was fine with that because I had a boyfriend that I had been with for 6 months. But then he broke up with me.

My friend and I were both single and this was during the summer so he'd come over and basically we cuddle and stuff and we'd kiss and makeout but never went further than that until one day we almost had sex.

Since then our friendship has fallen apart. It seems like every time I feel like he wants to be with me, he shuts me down like I never meant shit to him. He plays mind games with me because one minute he acts like he cares, telling me he loves me and that he wont let me down but that's all he does and the next minute, he acts like he doesn't care about me at all.

I'm tired of feeling like I'll never be good enough for him. He's the only guy I've ever wanted to be with and I love him more than anything in this world. I want to be with him more than anything, but I don't know what he feels because he never tells me.

He always chooses every other girl over me and it really hurts. He doesn't really know how I feel because I've never told him.

I know he loves and cares for me because he's always been there for me and always had my back and he's VERY overprotective. He tells me I'm beautiful and that he loves me but I just can't trust him anymore or believe anything he tells me because he lets me down constantly.

It feels like my feelings never mattered to him and that one minute he wants me and a minute later, he doesn't. I just don't know what to do anymore. Can you PLEASE help me?

Ask yourself the questions that will tell you if someone is right for you

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May 12, 2010
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Love and friendship can be harsh
by: Anonymous

I know how you feel. I had a friend (guy) who was just like that.
What I did was finally talked to him about it. And it helped for a while but then he just started back at it again.
We've grown apart and we still talk once in a while but we're not that close anymore.

People grow apart. I've had other boyfriends and he has other girlfriends now.

But I wish I had done something more because he was a really close friend to me and I think that if you really want this guy to be your friend, then do something about it. But then again you could give him his space for a while too, and then try again.

Do whatever your heart tells you. It will always be the right choice.

May 11, 2010
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Best Friends
by: Jackie in Jacksonville

Friendship is one thing that can be broken with intimacy, Move on and count your blessings. If it was meant for the two of you to be more than friends, it would be that, but it's not.

He plays the mind games and he's turned on and turned off with you with the flick of a light switch. If he cares and loves you, it's probably in a sisterly, brotherly way. MOVE ON! Keep the friendship but don't cross the line.

May 10, 2010
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Good Friend Most of the Time
by: Anonymous

He is a good friend most of the time. I just can't really get away from him when our moms are best friends and my best friend is his sister.

May 10, 2010
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Not Friend Or Lover
by: Penny

Not Friend Or Lover

Based on what you said in your post, you should leave this guy alone. Maybe once he cared or was your friend, but now he has changed and is playing mind games. Read over what you have written so you can see that what you need to do is run as fast as you can to get away from him!


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