Can't

by Emily Spicer
(Rochester, NH, US)

i decide to try again,
to look at your profile
without crying.
without throwing up.
i can't stop the tears,
when i see the words.
they pop out at me,
eating me alive from the inside...
"the love of my life,"
it stabs me in the chest,
and i can't heal the jagged hole.
my lungs close up,
and i can't breath.
my knees give in,
and i can't run away.
images of her swirl in front of me,
and i can't smile for days.