Depression Relationships

by Audrey

I'm Audrey and I've been with my boyfriend for two years. We are in high school, and we are in love with each other. Nothing has changed in the relationship, except 3 months ago, I developed a serious case of depression. As many times as I told my boyfriend it's not about him, he thinks I'm depressed because of him.

I also talk to him a lot about how I need to find self happiness and maybe it's time to break up, but I mean that in a very simple way, as in I don't want to, but I need to find peace and I don't want to keep making his life bad by blaming him for everything when really it's just my upset moods that make me want to be mean and mad all the time.

A few nights ago, I decided to hang out with my friend Zoe and I get a call from my friend saying my boyfriend is at a rave and he danced with like 3 girls (touching dancing, not too gross) and I was so heartbroken. He came over the next night, so we could talk about it and I forgave him because he said he went with his friends, he thought we were already going to break up, and he didn't think it would be a big deal.

We're both jealous, and it sucks because it makes it hard to live our lives, but the point is I've cried, he's said he's really sorry and wants to work things out, and I feel fine about it, but I'm still sad and confused. Any suggestions?