dumb to trust!

by mignon
(South Afica)

i am 17, and every holidays i go and visit my older sister. one of the nights we went out i met one of her friends. his name was matthew which was weird as my ex's name was also matthew.

anyway the night went on and we just kinda clicked...which for me was new as i'm always just friends with guys because i never want to be hurt. i saw him the rest of the time i was there and he was constantly saying how much he likes me and i'm his perfect woman, and that i must see him next time i go and visit my sister again.

so the day arrives where i have to go back home we both weren't happy about it, him more then me because i knew it was just a holiday fling and have never believed in love or relationships. i was not expecting anything from him.

i got back home and he phoned me. we spoke for a few hours. i still had not told him that i liked him and he was saying it a lot, but i was scared and i told him that which again i never do...

during the next 3 months we started a long distance relationship and he really made me love for the first time. we spoke to each other everyday, all day.

but by the 4th/ 5th month of this i felt as though something changed we spoke less and when we did, he was not concentrating.

so i felt that there must have been someone else. i never told him that's what i thought, instead i just said i don't think it's working and that i don't love him anymore, which was a lie. he was the only guy i've ever loved because he made me trust and love him.

he seemed a bit pissed but not even 10 min later he bb'd me and said he agrees that we should just be friends, but he still loves me and when i'm older we should back together cause i am the girl he want to be with forever.

and i actually believed him and was not so sad anymore.

a week later i'm on facebook and what do i see? he put himself in a relationship with some girl...

i really thought before that that i was fine and maybe it was infatuation and i never really loved him. but when i saw this i was crushed and had never ever felt so much pain.

luckily for me my best friend was at my house that week and we cried together for a week. i cried day and night and really wish he could drown in my tears as he made me love. before him i never have, and he might have at a stage made me love. but now he has made me hate love! he always said he would love me he lied.