How to know if he's not that into me?
I've been dating a guy in a long distance relationship for over 2 months.
He's an American, 51, living overseas with his child, and I am a Chinese, 40.
At first, my guy pursued me aggressively.
He said he wanted to love me forever after our first date.
It's partly because I accompanied him to watch his child's sports event in my country.
He lost his other child son's in a car accident and himself got hospitalized for a week because of an unexpected illness. I was all there supportive to him.
After discharged from ICU, he kept sending me text messages every day. Sometime the message came in as early as 4:30am.
Things between us turned a bit cool right after our second date, when we met in a third country while he attended his child's overseas school event.
We were very close during the trip. And he asked me about "love forever" issue again. After I accepted his pursuing, however, he turned to send me text messages less and less often. And I usually became the one who initiate to call him on Skype when I didn't hear from him for days.
He doesn't call, he doesn't write me emails, and he stopped saying "forever" thing after we had an arguments over emails for a couple of days.
What we argued about is that I happened to learn that he still visited the online dating website often, where we met.
We talked about breaking up. But then I begged for his forgiveness.
I decided not to ask him again if he's seeing some other women now.
I think if he's mine, then he will. If not, then I'll let go.
However, I can't help but be haunted by the question if he's really that into me or not?
Though he still shows his passion when sending me messages sometimes. I consider it as cheap "lip service". He only sends one-line messages such as "thinking of you." But he wouldn't spend time sharing what's happening in his life with me, if I didn't ask. I can hardly learn what he's up to, and what's on his mind at all.
I try to play cool in the relationship. But it gets more and more often that I am the one who initiates contacting each other when we both are online.
He's going back to work now after taking a long break to completely recover from the surgery. I wonder how often he'll contact me.
I still hope to be with him if he really loves me as he promised.
What should I do to win his heart?
Should I act like "hard to get" for him from now on?
How to know how serious he is taking me?