I lost him, he was perfect

by *Anonymous*
(Brick, NJ)

I met this guy a while back in 7th grade and he was so sweet, but I wasn't really good friends with him in 7th, but in 8th we became really good friends. I was going out with this kid and I broke up with him because he was saying stuff behind my back. The very same day I went over my friend's house and the boy who loved me was there. He asked me out and at that moment, I fell for him and I knew that I would never want to love anyone but him because to me he was just so perfect.

We were going out for exactly one month and I was out to dinner and was on AIM on my phone. He and I talked for a while and then he said, "We have to talk." And as EVERYONE knows those words are the absolute worst words to hear ever from your boyfriend. So I asked, what about. He said that he was hearing from everyone that I was flirting with other guys and that I liked someone else. And that wasn't true. But I did flirt with guys but not intentionally of course, every single girl in the world flirts with guys when they have boyfriends. It's not our fault, it's just a natural instinct. So, I told him that I don't flirt with guys and that I could never love anyone else but him. He didn't believe me. He told me this was going to take a lot of time. So I signed off.

This fight went on for two days until one day I wrote this entire long thing on my buddy info on AIM about him, he read it, and then he said to me, "No more thinking no more confusion, I've made up my mind, I will always love you and you will always have your own special place in my heart, and the rest is for in-person. So of course right then and there I knew that he was going to break up with me.

Throughout all of this, my friend was trying to help me, but none of it was working. She and him started becoming really good friends, having long talks on the phone at night and making up this fake island thingy, but of course none of that mattered to me, but the only thing that really bugs me is that she never really tried to stop him from breaking up with me. It was like she really didn't care that he was breaking up with me, but I still don't know that for sure. And she started saying all of this stuff to make me feel worse like, "What would you do if he liked me and I went out with him?" I said I would be sad but I wouldn't hate you or be mad at you.

So of course on Monday, he walked me over to a corner of the hallway in school and took my hands and said, "I love you, but I think we should break up."

I hugged him one last time and in that moment I wished it would have lasted forever. About a couple weeks later, I found out that he liked my best friend, the one who was asking me what would I do if they went out. And eventually, they did go out he asked her and she said yes.

Now I swore to her that I wouldn't act different to her in anyway, so I didn't. Everyday at 11:11, I make a wish that he will love me again and that I will be the one he holds in his arms and the one he says, I love you, to. I know he can't be feeling the same way he is for her like he did when he was with me, because he said I was the only one he had ever and will ever love this way.

And I went out with two guys so far after he dumped me but I broke up with both of them because I didn't want to love another because I only want to love him. And when he broke up with me, he said something to me, to not think of it as a break-up but to just think of it as a break, and that we were probably going to go out again.

You have no idea how many tears I've cried over him. Every minute of everyday I think of him, all the times we spent together, every kiss and every hug that I wish I could relive. And there's just that one moment that keeps going through my head that I know won't ever leave. And that's the first time he said, I love you, to me. I will always remember that day. I thought he was going to be the perfect end to my perfect fairytale. He was mine and I was his, I wanted it to stay that way forever, but that was a fantasy, but I guess all I got in the end, everything I ever deserved for talking to a single guy, was a reality check, in which I discovered that I wasn't his Cinderella, but he was and will always be my perfect Prince Charming.



Get your boyfriend back