I'm going through something very similar.... i dated a guy for 8 yrs... we broke up on good terms... we were talking occasionally but then things go messy and now we barely talk... i just recently saw him and spent time wit him and at first things were okay but.. slowly he became so distant and mean... his new girl was around and i was friendly, nice... and gave them space... but it was hard to turn off the feelings and emotions that had always been there for 8 yrs....i dont know what people mean by letting go... like obviously that means not talking to him.. but as cliche as it sounds do i unfriend him on facebook... like i'm stuck between what letting go means... do i completely disappear from his life.. even if i'm secretly hoping one day hell come back?
Jan 08, 2010 Rating
Don't Be Scared by: Anonymous
If you ready love him, let him go and in the future, if he comes back, he was yours but if he doesn't, then it was not meant to be. You will never forget your first love. Be his friend. Go on with your life like he is doing because life is short. Don't wait for him. I've done that and it didn't work out, so go on and test the waters out there like he is too. Don't be scared to go on, you'll be okay.
Dec 07, 2009 Rating
Know How You Feel by: Anonymous
Trust me, I know how you feel, but me and my ex have been together on and off for 5 and a half years. About 2 weeks ago, he got a new girl friend and he was telling me how happy he was with her! Then he goes and cheats on her with me 4 times (this is a habit: him cheating on his girlfriends with me and then us getting back together afterwards) but this time was different: he didn't want to leave her. He wanted me to try and be just friends with him and forget anything happened between us. I couldn't do that because I loved him so much and we went through a lot.
We have been engaged for two and a half years and now he wants to just drop me for someone else and be just friends. I told his girlfriend that he cheated on her and that I don't want her to leave him for it, but it is her choice to do it and now he doesn't want me in his life at all.
He is still with her and I'm a wreck, but I am a little glad that now he is happy. After he found out that I told her, he told me how I ruined his life and did nothing, but give him pain and wants me out of his life for good. But I still love him and I know I always will, but now I have to try and move on.
Nov 28, 2009 Rating
A Piece of Advice by: Bobby Sagra
"We perceive that only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives maybe built." - Twelve Step and Twelve Traditions, AAWS, Inc., New York, NY 10163 USA
My name is Bobby and I just read your story and request for advice. I was trying to write something on my blog when I notice that a related topic to my page here just came up. After reading your story, I would like you to know that I sympathize with you for the hurt you feel right now and the dilemma whether to stay just as a friend to the guy you still love.
One thing I know about women is that for a woman, love is everything. Please know that love is also the art of letting go. It's good to be honest to say you still love him. It takes a lot of courage to say "I can let him go."
In the book, Fire in the Belly, the author talks about the spirituality of being a man. He said, if a man really loves a woman, he has to leave her for the time being and go to a distant place. Then, in time he will feel how much he misses the woman, so he decides to return and discover and love her in a new way.
Maybe your man is just going through the same process of his being male. Just let him be, keep loving him and be a friend to him, then in time, God willing, he will come back to you to love you as a real man and stay with you forever.
