In love with my best friend
I had been close with this guy friend of mine almost 2 years ago. Though I don't seem to notice him before, since we've been classmates for almost six months, when my friend introduced the both of us, we immediately became close adding the fact that coincidentally, we're neighbors. Since then, we've been going home together and added the same subjects for the following semesters.
At first, everything was going great. I think I became so comfortable hanging out with him and my other best friends. From the start, my friends had been teasing us because we look like we're in a relationship; I didn't mind them because for me, I don't want to put some label to what we are in. All I know is that we?re friends.
But after some time, I?ve started feeling something inside me that I know I shouldn't have. I've started falling in love with him. I've denied this to myself many times. Then, I noticed that he is also acting strange towards me. He started being sweet towards me, like holding my hands and fetching me after school even though we didn't have the same schedule after the second term.
I didn't have the courage back then to ask him about what's going on between us but when I already had the guts to ask him, he started avoiding me. He?s not in the place we used to meet after class. At first, I thought that maybe he has some things to attend to but the two days that I wasn't able to see him became a week. When I finally had the chance to talk to him through text he told me that he got involved with a fight and that he doesn't want me to get involved either.
We didn't talk for months even though I tried to establish a communication between us. Few months after, I learned from a friend of mine that he is already in a relationship with a girl that used to be one of my closest friends that is in that time, is also in a relationship with another guy for a year.She was the one who had been teasing me about this guy friend of mine. I was so hurt but I didn't want them to see that I'm affected and broken. I acted that I was fine though the truth is I'm not. We all became like a stranger between each other.
4 months have passed since it happened, i realized I was able to move on for those times that I wasn't able to talk to both of them. I started being friends with them again and just pretended nothing happened.
But now, we became close again and that the past feelings that i had for him are also starting to grow. I don't want to experience again the pain that I had before. But the more I see him ,the more I can't stop thinking about him. I don't know if they are still in a relationship with that friend of mine and I don't wanna ask. What should I do?