I've loved you, known you. I'm sorry for even looking at you.
by Ken
A few months later at a friend's party she was there, and we both sat on the couch, her legs were on me. We were looking at each other. I was planning to ask her out. I said "Would you ever go out with me?" Her reply was "I would but I can't trust you at the moment because you're asking too many girls out and I can't trust you." I am currently in grade 10 and asked her again, she said no. I confronted her about what she said in grade 7 and every time I bring that up she denies it. I cannot stop hearing those words "No, I can't trust you," and it kills me inside. She's really popular, well known and everyone idolizes her. I still love her, I was there at her toughest times. She's moving permanently to France in 5 months and I just want to hang out with her, talk to her alone. I just want to let her know I'm sorry for even asking. The only way I can get the money and have enough vacation days when I'm older really quickly is to join the Military. She doesn't know I have that choice in mind. She's starting to hate me because her best friend is the girl who hates me. I still love her. I dated many girls but they weren't the ones I truly liked. I live in fear now that if I say "I know I won't get her" and asked out many girls and then ask if the girl would ever go out with me, she would say the same thing. I just want her to know I'm doing all of this for her. I'm joining the military, saving money, for a trip to France for 1 week. Oriana, please don't leave. I don't want to live in fear of rejection, being lost, being hurt. I love you. I hope one day this will be famous and you will see it. I'll love you through thick and thin. I just want to hug you and cry, let everything out. Please. |