Love Her and Lose me

by Lily

Everyone's love story is different. Nothing is ever the same for anyone. This happend, but you don't know why. It's always funny to look back and see all thats happend, but you still can't let it go.


I was a freshmen in High School. I had one class with all guys, JROTC. It was a great class with only 10 kids including me. There were two of the nine that I talked to the most in the class. There names were Jayden and Chris.

Half the years gone by and I start to connect with Jayden. We always sat together at lunch and worked with each other in class. We always messed around with each other. We would fight with each other to get the other to fight back. Then we would bust out laughing.

A few weeks later he'd start calling me around 8 or 9 every night, and we would talk until 12 midnight, even on a school night. We would barely talk sometimes yet somehow it'd be two hours on the phone every single time.

Then there was this one time when we were talking on the phone and he tells me he likes me. I'm sitting there speechless. I wanted to tell him that i liked him too, but i was to shocked... We're both silent for a moment then he says my name and butterflies flies all around in my stomach, I end up telling him I like him too. We got deep into the conversation when he tells me he has a girlfriend...

I was confused, why would you tell me that you like me when you have a girlfriend. I don't like being the third wheel. I don't like being a homewrecker. ( as my friends would call it.)

Time keeps on going and we still acted the way we did before we told we liked each other. We ket flirting in class and messing around when ever we could. ...But he still hasnt broken up with his girlfriend yet..

Summer time comes and we're off to our own lives... The entire summer we didnt talk to eachother. I didnt talk to any of my friends. Only maybe five, but I was always busy. I had to work and never had time for anything. We didnt talk all summer, and the summers just about over when he texts me and says hi. We had an hour long conversation over IMs. He then asks me, "do you still like me?" .. I took about two minutes to think about it and said, "yes" We both said we were suprised that i still liked him cause we havent talked all summer. I asked him and he said he still liked me. (The only problem was he was still going out with his girlfriend.

School starts again and we hug and talk and we have the same class with each other again. The same old feelings were back. A few weeks into school and we keep talking about how much we really like each other.. He kept telling me that he was going to break up with his girl friend because they werent getting along.. a month has past and they still were going out. I asked him why and he said he didnt want to hurt her.. I said if you really dont like her then just do it, someones going to get hurt either way.. He kept saying I know I know...

Days or weeks later.. I find out hes single. I was happy, of course.. So then we started getting into flirting awhole lot more than usual.. A few more days go by and i havent seen him in school.. I'm starting to worry, cause i cant seem to get into contact with him.. The following monday he comes back into school with a problem and that he's been int he hospital. I gave him the biggest hug, happy that hes okay.. The days went on and everything seemed the same.. other than the fact that we seemed to slowly grow apart...

That weekend i went onto his facebook to see what hes been up to..And I find out that he's in a relationship again and his girlfriend.. posted a wallpost saying how happy she is to be together again! I didnt notice at first how much it hurt me until I felt the tears stream down my face.

The weekend ended and it was time to go back into school and see his face.. Half the days gone by and I havent seen him. But then it came to the time when we were passing by in the halls and he grabs my arm and tells me to walk with him during class. SO then I do.. We walked around in the hallways for about 5 minutes just talking.. At first he's really quiet, and i'm thinking to myself. he suddenly start talking and starts telling me how he was back with his ex.. I told him i already knew.. He gulped.. and told me the exact story that happened, he was on drugs at the hostpial when his mother came in with her.. His mother didnt know they broke up.. He was still going off on this loopy drug when she asked him back out and he said yes... I told him i believed him.. even though i didnt know if i should've...

Its almost ten minutes when we were walking back up the stairs to get back to class so it wouldnt look suspicious.. He tells me he realllllllyyyy likes me, and he wanted a kiss.. He kept asking for one as we walked up the stairs. When we were at the top i was infront of him and he asked one last time, "can you please kiss me? just once?" I kept on walking.. He pulls my arm and spins me around, like a fairy tale, and we end up kissing.. My heart starts to race. I liked it..

Every single day after that we kept on kissing. at least twice a day... I know weird to keep count, but.... It kept happening and I let it. Then I start telling my best friend about it and she tells me it needs to stop, he still has a girlfriend, it wasnt right..

I took a day to think about it and she was right... The next day he tries and kiss me, i do but then suddenly pull back, i guess my friends words got to me, i told him he needs to breakup with his girl first before i kiss him again.. or else we would have to stop and he can keep it going with is girl.

He kept trying to kiss me five more times that day, but every time, I wanted to, but I just couldn't do it.

It has been weeks now and we haven't kissed and he still hasn't broken up with his girlfriend. So I suppose he still likes her, but he seems to be sad every time I see him and I don't want to ask. I heard that he was single, but it hurt and he wants her back.

So I don't know how I feel anymore. I love him, but I have no idea what he is thinking. All I know is that I won't be getting over him anytime soon, but I hope he does decide whether he wants me or her. I'm sick of playing this game.




Love her and lose me.

500 tips to make you a better lover

Comments for Love Her and Lose me

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Apr 23, 2015
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reply NEW
by: Anna

The story of your old love reminded me of my old love at my college. As someone said, love is much blissful when returned and those days were really blissful. Thank you so much for reminding me of those golden days. Birchmeier backpack sprayer

Jun 02, 2010
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I never heard a story like this
by: angel ^-^

Wow, guys can really be a jerks. But hey, congratulations because you have controlled yourself.

May 13, 2010
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I honestly must say, I'm impressed.
by: Josh S (16 yr old)

Guys are assholes lol. Come on, and I'm only saying this from expereince because I'm one lol. (not gay btw) And anywho, I never really got girls too often in my life.

I got one now, but I consider myself pretty lucky because she's actually the first girl I ever kissed, and I'm the first guy she ever kissed, and our relationship is going very smooth at the moment, and we're only like a month and a half into it lol. But hey, good luck.

Apr 16, 2010
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I Can So Relate
by: Anonymous

OMG, I can so relate to this. This guy keeps telling me he likes me but he has a girlfriend. I like him a lot too. I did so much stuff to show him that. I'm literally falling in love with him.

He said he is gonna break up with his girlfriend for me, but still hasn't done it yet. I'm still here, waiting..(FINGERS CROSSED FOR BOTH OF US)

Jan 29, 2010
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Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater
by: Ruby Star

I am not trying to sound discouraging, but do you really want to be with someone who is cheating on his girlfriend? You are making the right choice by holding off on being with him. Never settle or be second best no matter how much you love someone.

If he really loved you, then he would stop playing games and being dishonest and make a definite choice. He obviously doesn't know who or what he wants, despite what he says and it sounds like he just wants to play the field.

Please, don't encourage his behavior. I have been through a similar experience, so speaking from experience, I can tell you that if they will cheat with you when they have someone else, they will definitely cheat on you too, no matter how much they say they love you.

I had this happen to me and I was with the person for 2 years and he was my first love. He said I was his angel and that he wanted us to get married, but it was all false because he cheated on me, just like he cheated with me. The night we met and kissed he still had a girlfriend. I distanced myself from him when I found that out, but he wound up breaking up with her to be with me.

Regardless, despite all that, things did not end good at all and I still live with the scars from that relationship. I had to find out the hard way: once a cheater, always a cheater!

Please don't make the same mistake. Stay on the right road like you are doing, and next time, don't let things go as far as they did. Keep respect for yourself & other people.

Best of Luck to you! Hope you find someone who will be faithful and give you and only you his love and undivided attention, Remember, never settle for less, it's not worth it.

How to find out for sure if someone is right for you

Jan 29, 2010
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WOW
by: Anonymous

Wow. I can honestly say that you're amazing. It is so cool that you could choose the hard and right road over the easy one. I hope he chooses you if that's what you really want. But if it's not, then I hope you find someone who will treat you right.

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