Common Marriage Problems & How to Solve Them

Although you may be overwhelmed at the idea of learning how to solve your marriage problems, there are some simple steps you can take that will help you improve your relationship and inspire you to do even more.

As a relationship expert, I have done a lot of research and after consulting therapists, psychologists and reading every book on marriage that I could get my hands on, I can tell you without a doubt that the biggest indicator of success in a marriage is your ability to communicate. It is true that a lack of communication or misunderstandings that result from poor communication are at the core of most couples' marital conflicts.

You've heard the theory that women are from Venus and men from Mars and in order to communicate effectively you need to understand that men and women speak different languages and have different needs. Understanding this is primary. I remember twenty years ago when I took a class on couples communication, I learned that every problem stems from the way we communicate or fail to communicate with our spouse or partner.

Marriage Problems Advice

One exercise I learned in that couples communication class is learning how to communicate with your spouse without actually speaking. This will teach you much about how our body language speaks volumes. How you talk to your spouse is often more important than what you say. For instance, if your husband talks to you with an angry look on his face, even though his words may not sound angry, you will interpret that body language and may get defensive.

Marital issues can start with simple things: misreading body language and facial cues, becoming defensive even before our partner opens his mouth. By trying to communicate through body language, touch and facial expressions alone, you will start to see how communication operates on many levels and how it's crucial to make sure your body language is in line with your intentions and take the time to interpret your spouse's body language properly.

marriage problems

When you understand more about how body language relates to marriage problems, then you also start to realize the power of physical touch. Touching creates a physical connection, so if you touch someone briefly as you talk to them, you are more likely to get their attention and really make an impact with your words.

That said, I want to emphasize that if you and your spouse are having issues, there is one group of people that you should never ask for marriage problems advice: your children. While kids obviously know when their parents are having issues, they should not be drawn into your conflicts in any way because this puts them in between the two people they love and admire most.

Focus on the power of touch. As a child, if you were raised in a family that was not demonstrative, you may be less inclined to hug, kiss and touch your partner. However physical touch is one of most primary needs. As you may know, babies die if they are not touched by their caregivers. In much the same way, adults cannot live in isolation. Learn how to reach out and touch your partner.

Believe it not, you can lessen your friction and marriage problems by learning how to touch with loving hands, give kisses, hold hands, hug, touch each other briefly when you speak and more. The best marriage problems advice begins by initiating more physical contact. As you do, you'll start to feel more connected to your spouse and will be able to work on the deeper issues.

As you begin to touch your partner more, you'll discover that he or she is more receptive to working on your relationship. By engaging your spouse physically, you may discover that resolving your seemingly overwhelming marriage problems may be less difficult than you think.

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