My 4th grade crush

So, it all started in 4th grade. Their was this boy that I would talk to every once in a while. His name was Jesus. We talked all throughout the year. I didn't know this at the time, but I was indeed in love with him. We would sit next to each other and giggle. Than the summer time came and i was upset because I wasn't sure if he'd be returning in the fall for 5th grade. Anyways, over the summer I experienced something that felt very incredible to me. I was suffering from not seeing him. When it was time for school to start up again I was so happy! I couldn't wait to see him. The first da of school was finally here. I had been waiting 2 1/2 months. So, when I got to school, there he was looking cute as ever. I sat down next to him and we started talking. As the months went on we grew closer and closer and when I had left 5th grade to move somewhere else, I was deeply saddened because I wasn't sure if I would ever see him again. As the months past, I felt more attached to him. Finally, at the beging of 6th grade, I went back. He wasn't there! I almost cried (not really). So, I went about with my life. It was until one day we were in the computer lab that I saw him walk in the door. He came back! His and my eyes instantly met. It felt so good to see him after so long. So, later in the school year we had a class together. Art. Their I learned where he was all those months. Me and him would joke around and talk to each other. He would sit at my art table and he said to me that he had a gf in California and wondering if she was cheating on him. Anyways, everyone knew I liked/loved him so they asked me if we were going out. We were not. That's the truth. So, it came time for our school dance and when I saw him there break dancing to temperature by Sean Paul, I was instantly reminded why I had fell in love with him. Other girls would try to 'talk' to him, but he wasn't buying it. I was the only girl he really 'talked' to so I felt special. One day he came up to me with his friend and said he heard that I liked him and asked me if it was true. I said no. And Than they walked away! I felt so stupid! But the good thing is that we still talked. But, I've been wondering, if I would've said yes, how would it have ended differently?! To this day I wonder where he is and how he's doing because I do love him. After all, he was my first crush and I miss him like CRAZY. I haven't seen him in 5 years. I am now in 11th grade. I am wondering, how do I move on because I'm pretty sure I will never see him again but I don't know how??