Question Boyfriend's Intentions

by Amanda
(United States)

My boyfriend and I have been together for one year. He's going away to college this year and he chose this particular college because it was closest to me because he loves me. He never told me that was the reason, but since he didn't want to go to the college for himself, I feel like he has started to resent me.


For the past two months of our relationship, I've felt ignored by him and it's been really depressing me. Then we got into a fight and he told me he feels held back, like he's married to me. We broke up and I was completely devastated.

I ignored him for a few day and he came back to me and told me that he's sorry and that he f**ked up and he loves me and misses me.

Finally after trying to resist him, I got back together with him. The only problem with all of this is, I don't know if I can trust him to not do this to me again.

I also found out today that he told his friends before he started dating me that he didn't want a girlfriend. I'm scared he's playing games and just got back together with me out of pity or because he's been with me for so long that he's just used to me. I don't know what to do and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells to keep him in my life.

Get to know the intentions of the person you are dating

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Jul 27, 2009
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Is This Boyfriend Right for You?
by: Penny

Amanda,
Your intuition from the beginning seems to be correct. What your boyfriend said during the fight, "he feels held back like he's married to you," proves your intuition was correct. What you later found out about his not wanting a girlfriend added to it.

Now you're uncomfortable, fearing he might repeat his past behavior and you feel like you're walking on eggshells to keep him in your life.

You don't have to be uncomfortable fearing that he might repeat past behavior or walk on eggshells IF you don't want him in your life. You only need to ask yourself three questions...do you want him in your life?... feeling uncomfortable and fearing that he might do it again? Do you want to take that chance?

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