Relationship Advice about Boyfriend's Confusing Behavior
by Jovonne
(Albany, GA)
Relationship Advice about Boyfriend's Confusing Behavior
I am 23 and I have been talking to this guy for almost a year now and he just turned 22. I met him during the spring semester of 2007 when we had class together. I didn't know that he was interested in me at the time because I didn't pay much attention to him or anyone else in that class. He made small talk with me. And one day while I was in the gym, he came out of basketball practice and asked if he could talk to me and I kind of brushed him off in a nice, joking way.
Before this day, I didn't know he played ball for the school. A couple of days later he wrote me a message on Facebook, basically asking if he could get to know me better and call me sometime. After asking a friend of mine about him I was told he had a girlfriend, but my friend wasn't 100 % sure about this.
After we wrote back and forth for a couple of days I gave him my number but told him I was talking to someone only because I thought he had a girlfriend. We ran into each other a couple of times after that. My cousin ended up writing him and we starting talking.
Everything was good for about the first six months. We talked everyday and spent a lot of time together at his house. Then I started hearing about him talking to these different girls and also his ex-girlfriend who he broke up with in December (a month before we started talking).
We've never been on a date, not even out together anywhere, or even in the same car. I will do anything for him and he knows that. I'm always there when enver he needs anything. During this whole time, I haven't talked to or been with anyone else besides him and I don't give anyone else the time of day.
I know that he has talked to and been with others girls. I know about all of the girls and some know about me and give me dirty looks and stares when they see me. But he always ends up calling me asking, why he hasn't heard from me and that I'm different person now and that he wants it back to how it use to be.
But it's like he doesn't have time for me anymore, but has all the time in the world for his teammates and other female friends. I can honestly say I do love him. He tells me all the time he wants to make it work between us and that he does care about me and my feelings. But I don't believe him sometimes, I really don't know what to believe.
In the club or at parties, he may speak but he won't dance with me anymore, but he gets mad when I dance with another guy. He got mad when I told him I was going on a date with another guy. I don't know what to believe or what to do. Once during the summer, he told me he was afraid of commitments because every time he gets close to someone, it doesn't go right.
What is your relationship advice about this problem?
I know this guy is young and a star athlete in college and a lot of girls are after him. Am I wasting my time or does he really care? Do you think that he wants to make it work with me? Or does he just "want to have his cake and eat it too"?