Safe to Call it Love?

by Lisa
(Charlotte, NC)

I've known this guy for two years and we've been inseparable the entire time. We met at work, and just took instant attraction to one another. But a lot of the females at the job noticed him as well. At the same time, the males took notice to me. So people would ask if we're dating but we'd say no, because we weren't. But it seemed all his attention was always on me.


But I still had the player mentality, which I think made him start to wonder about me. I was only twenty at the time we met, so I was still in the game hard. He was older, 24, and after a while it started to look as if he was still in the game as well.

I'd always let other guys ask me out in front of him. Guys would come to my job and ask me for my number and all sorts of things. I'm sure this was a huge turn-off in his mind, since he seemed very interested in me.

He did however, continue to call me, text me, and hang out with me. He never asked for sex, or even tried. I met his family, best-friend, and his whole crew of male friends. They all took a liking to me, saying I was pretty, smart, and cool to be around.

But my issue being that I was still immature, I would call him up to tell him about other guys and tell him how so-and so was trying to date me. He'd always say he was losing interest and wished I'd stop talking about other guys. But to me that didn't register. I always thought he was just interested in being my friend and wasn't interested in me as more than a friend.

Now two years later, he makes a bet with me that he can seduce me in a course of three weeks. That seemed so odd to me because I never thought he'd be attracted to me in that way, (though I am very attractive, as people tell me). I agreed to the bet, simply because it was something new, and venturing into the unknown...some excitement to our stagnant friendship.

i am afraid to tell him how i truly feel about him (I'm in love with him), because i don't know how he feels. I'm always worried that he might be a player, like I was and just be out for one thing.

But considering our history, I'd hope that he feels something deep for me as well. So now I'm in a dilemma because I never want to give the impression that i'm chasing a guy, though it is 2008.

Another thing is that I'm away at school now, which is only 45 minutes away...and so I don't get to see him as much as I'd like. He said that we can still do simple things like go out for ice-cream and stuff, but there won't be any more hanging out, because he feels I've stuck him in the friendship position and he'll never get out of it.

He said he's tired of being "just a friend." so he's quitting us playing video games together and giving me relationship advice. So does he like me? Is he trying to get me thinking of him as more than a friend? Is it safe for me to say something?

One more thing, every time he sees me like after a few months, he looks at me as if I'm the only person on earth. I always laugh to myself that I cannot be that interesting. He does that thing from movies where he sees me from across the room and can't stop staring. It's really cute.

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