Should I Be Suspicious?

by Nicole
(Indiana)

I'm 18. My fiance is quite a bit older. He's the first man I've ever been with that has a kid. His son's mother was his first girlfriend, they went out for five years. He said it was a very bad relationship and I believe it. She had some mental illnesses that would make a relationship hard. He loved her and we met when they were still together, so I know the depth of their love. For the first few months we were together, all I heard about was him and his ex. It's now been two years. He talks about her occasionally ... it's all bad, and he sees her every other weekend to spend time with his son (I love his son like he is my own). We've had many fights over them talking ... he's the jealous type and I don't think it's fair that he can tell me to not talk to my exes, but he talks to his. He said he'll stop.

I go to school and work so we only spend time together at night and on the weekends. I can't stop suspecting that he is talking to her when I am busy. I know I shouldn't have done this, but I looked at his phone bill and saw her number on there about 10 times on Valentine's Day. We were in a fight on Valentine's Day because he didn't get me anything and wouldn't take me out. He was sick, or so he says. I don't want to question him about her because I know it will start a fight. Lately, I've noticed his decreased appetite for sex. He is less affectionate toward me and he no longer does spontaneous sweet things for me. Is this just the end of the honeymoon period, am I jealous or do I have the right to be suspicious? I don't want to lose him and I don't want to lose his son. He's brought so much good into my life, but I don't want to be played again.