Spouse Arguing - Why You Can't Stop Fighting & How to Stop

Spouse arguing?

Are you tired of fighting constantly with your spouse? Maybe you fight over money, the kids, or whose job it is to do which chores around the house ... it doesn't matter that much what you fight about. What's more important is what it is doing to your marriage.

The problem is that your constant arguing is driving a wedge between you and your wife or husband. And it's killing the joy in your marriage. Unresolved conflicts lead to tension, hurts and unspoken resentments which only grow worse with time. The problem is that most couples don't know how to fight. They don't know how to resolve conflicts or talk to each other in a way that will get their spouse to listen.

Spouse Arguing - Conflict Creates More Conflict

As I said earlier, it's not so much what you fight about, but why you're arguing with spouse. You fight because you're not on the same page about issues both big and small. You argue because you are disconnected as a couple ... because you no longer feel the love between you.

Worse yet, if you have children, you probably argue about them as well. In fact, in a large majority of marriages, children become the focus of arguing with spouse. One parent may be more permissive and one more authoritarian and so there are constant disagreements about your gulf in parenting styles. Of course, when you fight about the kids, it's much easier for your kids to come between you. This isn't good for you and it isn't good for your kids.

Bickering constantly about the children is a sign that you and your spouse need help. Couples who fight about their children do so because they're not willing to deal with their own issues. In other words, your fights about the kids are really about both of you.

Spouse Arguing - Getting Back to the Love

spouse arguing

Do you remember what it was like when you first fell in love with your spouse or partner? You couldn't get enough of each other, couldn't keep your hands off each other. What happened to that love?

Would you be surprised if I told you that the love is still there, buried beneath the surface. The problem is that life gets in the way of our love and connection to each other. TLife throws us curve balls and challenges and most of us don't have the relationship skills to reconnect during trying times or after small betrayals, infidelities or arguments. When we can't reconnect, spouse arguing starts and resentment builds.

The reason you don't know how to reconnect is that no one has ever taught you these skills. But don't worry, you can learn them and use them to stop arguing with spouse and save your marriage.

The way to stop arguing with spouse in its tracks is to change the way you relate to your partner. When you change how you act, your partner will change in kind, even if he or she is not willing to work on your marriage.

The key to stop arguing with spouse is to seek professional help or find a way to learn the communication skills that you and your partner are lacking. Since a lot of couples don't like to go to therapy and air their dirty laundry to a stranger, I recommend you read my review of The Us Factor, a new relationship program that will teach you how to touch your partner with your words, how to communicate in a way that is honest, but loving and how to get back the love in your relationship.

Spouse Arguing - Relationship Advice

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