This is like The End...question mark.
by Shhh
(Riverside, CA.)
I just don't understand how such good love and concern went down the drain...
I met him when I was in 8th grade, right off the bat he was my first love. But we broke up so many times it's sad I have lost count. Oh, he hurt me bad countless times, he didn't appreciate a thing. Yet I let him back into my life; love didn't fade a bit throughout those torturing months. I am at my senior year now and gave him yet another chance.
I have to admit he does love me and I still love him the same or more than ever before. Yet the past seems to haunt me, it has me stuck. I dedicate my precious time on him, every single moment of it that I have grown to not love myself. I don't know why it got this way but it was always about him...
I have my head on pretty good shoulders and it killed me to know he did not, so i advised him and suggested so many things...but I'm looking so far ahead he can't keep up. He has his bad habits which I wish he could leave behind and focus to begin a new lifestyle..but my urge is to see it now. And he won't even try and fails everytime we come to an agreement.
I gave up and I won't have an immature boy hold me back from my dreams. I love him so dearly and much, and the thought that maybe we're just not meant hurts me a little more every day.
I hope one day he changes, and maybe one day we'll end up talking again... He was my everything but everything isn't always what I need. Hope is all I can keep in my dull and delicate heart.