What Does She Really Want

by mitch
(canton, MI)

My girlfriend of 8 years broke up with me when she met someone else 3 months ago. They have been dating since. There has been infidelity from both of us but we started to move on, or at least I thought so.


She said she doesn't trust she would be the only woman for me and only sees herself getting hurt. Anyway, for the first couple months I did all the wrong techniques, always texting, begging, calling, etc. She admitted a month ago that she has been exclusive with this person starting a couple weeks after we broke up.

In the last month, we rarely spoke. Maybe once a week, we talk for a half hour or text back and forth. Now she is saying that she doesn't know exactly what she wants, is still so in love with me, but says she has gone so far with this other person that she doesn't think things would ever be the same between us.

Also, she really does have feelings for this person and doesn't want to end it with him because she doesn't want to hurt him. So instead of figuring things out on her own, she is continuing to see him which is only going to make her forget me.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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Apr 18, 2009
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Hope this helps....
by: Sylvia

She is not in love with you or the other guy. Doesn't know what she wants. My friend, there are many fishes in the ocean, go fishing! She won't make you happy, but miserable. Good luck!

Apr 18, 2009
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You poor soul
by: Anonymous

Wow! GET RID OF HER! Move on with your life. Obviously, she's not the one for you.

Apr 18, 2009
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" The Truth Is "
by: Penny

Sometimes being blunt will hurt, but the plain and simple truth is she wants to move on without you and this is her way of letting you down easy. As much as I know this hurts and I'm very sorry....really, move on with your life and accept that she wants to as well.

Apr 18, 2009
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Want her Back
by: moorelauree@yahoo.com

If you want her back, back off. Women love attention. That does not mean the more attention you give her the better off you are. It means quit giving her attention and move on with your life or at least act like it. That will get her attention. When you give a woman attention they feed off of it. When you don't give them any they wonder why, and start chasing you. Believe me I know. I know it is hard, but it works.

If you don't know how to do this, read this ebook

Apr 17, 2009
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Moving On
by: Ruby Star

I can honestly say that I know how you feel, because I have been through a similar situation with my first love. I found out the hard way, that once a cheater always a cheater!

If she really loved you the way she claims, then she would not have made the decisions she did and that she is making now. She sounds very unsure and like she doesn't know what she wants or who she wants.

You deserve to be with someone who knows that they want you and can give you their true love, not just convenient love, which is not really true love at all.

I know it will be hard after being with someone that long, and I know you may feel that a part of you is missing without her, but do yourself a big favor and please move on with your life and away from her.

Concentrate on getting you back and what you personally enjoy, and then and only then will you be able to be in another relationship and make someone else happy.

It may take time, but in the long run, it will be soo worth it! Trust me, I speak from personal experience! Best wishes to you!!

Apr 17, 2009
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Leave it lay,
by: cookie_346@yahoo.com

If she cheated on you once, she will do it again.
I agree that you should move on from this sick relationship and work on yourself. Sounds like your self esteem has been lost.

No one is worth losing who you are to please them.

You are important and someone out there will appreciate you, but first you have to pull yourself out of the mire here.

As long as you try to get her back, the more she will see that she can play you and I believe that she actually is enjoying tormenting you.

It's like a game to her, so let it go and you will be surprised at how much your self esteem will grow.

Best wishes to you and God Bless.
Cookie

Apr 17, 2009
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Do You
by: Anonymous

The only healthy thing you can do for yourself is move on. Not with another person either, move on in doing things for yourself and things to improve yourself, work on you. You might find out that you might not even want the relationship anymore or where this relationship was taking you, you don't want to be taken anymore.

When we start doing new things at first it's uncomfortable, unfamiliar and it is easier to settle into old familiar things.

You can't make people love you or act right so you can only improve yourself and wait for the person who will trust and love you and not be confused.

Stay strong, Mitch, and do you. God Bless!

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