What Went Wrong?
by S. L. Vang
The odd thing was he was a really good friend when we were little. He still is now, but I had an odd feeling for him. It was as if i longed for him too. One problem was that I was afraid. I've learned my lesson many times before to not get too close or I will fall for him and risk getting hurt and I was afraid he might break my heart. Honestly, he was the best thing that's happened to me. We were inseparable we spent most of the time together but we also gave each other space, we never fought, or left the other to sulk around by themselves. Then the last day of school finally came, we said our goodbyes to our friends and to each other, we had our hugs and left. The next day, I was wondering what he was doing or what he was thinking about. We talked sometime on the phone, and we had planned to hang out at the park but a thunderstorm had changed those plans. As summer was ending, I was excited to see all my friends and him again, but something didn't feel right. Earlier in the summer, one of my friends and I were talking and he told me we probably weren't dating anymore then. Whenever I tried to talk to him on the phone, I was always told he wasn't home or he was busy. So I started to doubt our relationship. First day of school finally came around and it was the most confusing, heartbreaking day for me. He started to ignore me, and tried to pretend I wasn't there. I told myself that this is just something we'll get over but nothing ever got better. I shed tears while he pretended nothing was wrong. Then my best friend who is his best friend too told me he still likes me. So I thought finally something is getting better but then he didn't do anything about it. I finally decided to give up and since then I've been fine, but my best friend tells me, "He still like you, he's scared to ask you out again because he's afraid you will say no because of what he did last time." The thing was I think I knew I would say yes, because deep down inside I knew I still loved him. I had tried to fix things so we could be friends or even get back together (I believe in second chances). He didn't do anything about it. Again, I gave up and lived my life with this broken heart of mine. I've been single from the 3 months of school to the end, but now I have feelings for someone else, someone I know is fun and outgoing and sweet and sincere. I'm still wondering what could have been if none of this had happened. He's moved on and so have I. I've attempyed to wait for him to see what he would do but I figured out that's a waste of my time. If he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore then I won't have anything to do with him. The thing was, I didn't lose him, he lost me (at least that's what it seemed like). No matter what now, I'm not going back to him. I've learned my lesson for the last time. I know now that if I don't fall in love, I'll be okay. That's going to be difficult with the guy I like now, but I have to try. Click here to read or post comments. |