Who does he want?

by yalondia
(maryland)

I have known a guy for about 5 years. During that time, he was married and divorced with custody of his young son. He always had a crush on me but I never gave him a chance because I too was in a relationship. Fast forward 5 years later. He moves to my area. We have been dating for 6 months. Since his divorce he told me he had one girlfriend who did everything for him. He is still very much close with her friendship-wise. He has said that he has his "ride or die chick" so to speak. That no matter what, she will be there. They love one another but he doesn't love her in the sense of wanting to be in a relationship with her. My issue is that she still does things for him out of kindness but, I feel like somewhere he is reciprocating something. For instance she bought him an Xbox360 for Christmas. Me being a single parent, I can't do that for him. But I explained to him that she is an ex and lines have to be drawn. To accept a gift like that is possibly giving her false hope that they will get back together. She has written him numerous times about how she wants to spend the rest of her life with him.

Now she knows about me but doesn't know how serious our relationship is. He says he's tried to tell her but she gets so angry and he is going to risk losing a good friend. He doesn't want to hurt her. My question is since we have talked a few times about possible marriage and kids ... won't she be hurt regardless because its not her? Then isn't he using her as a security blanket that if things don't work out with us then he will have someone to fall back on? How can she move on to find someone if she is pining over him and him still letting on that there is a possibility when there isn't? Please give me your advice.