Why does he keep me as a secret? Should I dump him?

by charlotte
(Latvia)

I've been in this relationship with one guy for like three months and it's okay except for the fact he wants to keep it secret. We both live in a small town and since he's kinda a known person and has many friends and all the people know him, he said it would be better we didn't tell anyone about us.

At first I was okay with that, because I knew there would be much fuss about us seeing each other and also I wasn't sure if we would remain together anyway. But now, as I said, it's been over three months and nothing has changed. He claimed he loved me and sometimes comes up with the ideas of moving in together or having kids but the fact is that I don't really trust him about that.

I don't know any of his friends, he doesn't know mine. We meet on regular basis, but only at his place or mine, where we talk, watch TV or do other things, you know. lol.

Sometimes he takes me on a getaway or some trips but as far as our town is concerned, he doesnt want anyone to know. I spoke to him about this but he always says he is afraid of the reaction of the people.

Anyway, I feel that I don't want it like this. I may be a coward to ditch him because when we are together, it's kinda nice and I like being with him but I still think he's just not that into me. He's about 6 years older and has a kid, he's got troubles with his ex who he claims he hates. But I don't think that hate is a good thing.

He still might have feelings for her, which is something he always denies. They separated a year ago and she lives with another man.

Maybe he is still heartbroken, I dunno. I'm not really afraid of breaking up with him, because I know I may easily find a new guy and I don't see a reason for him to be ashamed of me. It's just that I do like him and don't want to give up on him just because of this.